Birth Story Day 4: April 25, 2012

Day 4: Wednesday, April 25, 2012   

    At long last, the time was upon us. It had been three days of waiting, wondering, and praying. We all knew it couldn't go on much longer, and that very soon, the waiting would be over.
    As Tuesday crept into Wednesday, I was laboring so intently that I felt like I was in another world. I was in the worst part of labor and I felt like I was dying. I was just to ready for it all to be over that I started to push. I didn't feel 'the urge' that some people talk about; I just pushed because I thought it meant I would be done faster! I didn't realise how much more energy I would burn having to push with every contraction, but I really didn't care. I wanted that baby OUT. It was around 1:30 in the morning when I started pushing. I stayed in the pool for a while, but then it became clear that I couldn't get enough strength while I was in the water. Donna forced me to get out (trust me, I didn't want to!) and sat me on the birth stool, which looks (and feels!) like a medieval torture device. I'm thankful that it didn't help, because she quickly let me get off and lay on the bed. She had me on my back, which is precisely how people tell you not to push, but it worked, and that's all we cared about.
     I had Andrew behind me, holding me and soothing me with each contraction. I was surrounded by my mom, my mother-in-law, my sister-in-law, my midwife, her assistant, my photographer, and her sister. It was kind of like a big party in between contractions! :P They all cheered me on as I pushed Anna to crowning, and reassured as she stayed there for half an hour. It was almost over, and the finish line was in sight for all of us. After 9 months of pregnancy, more than 60 hours of steady labor, and almost 3 hours of pushing, my little girl was ready to make her debut. Everyone cheered when her head was delivered and they could finally see that little face we had all been waiting for. I felt like I had nothing left in me, and I just wanted to stop, but I could see her. I could see the baby I had waited my whole life for, so I dug down deep in my soul and scraped out the last drop of energy I could find. I closed my eyes, and I pushed. And then, all of a sudden, there she was.
    This little tiny person, so helpless, was there waiting for me. I took her under the armpits and pulled her up to my chest, and at that moment, I felt complete. I had missed her so much without ever having met her, and then she was there in my arms. There are no words for how that moment felt, with my husband behind me and my daughter on my chest; our little family was finally together. I cried and cried that moment as I became a mother. I had fulfilled the calling that God had sent me, and my life was totally changed forever. Then I realized that the little girl on my chest, wrapped in a towel and looking into my eyes, was totally dependent on me for everything, and if that's not a humbling feeling, I don't know what is!
    It was around that time that Donna noticed something was off about her. She wasn't as pink as she should have been (she was kind of purple), she wasn't crying, and her muscle tone was terrible. She took her from me and started doing mouth-to-mouth. I was still in a daze and flooded with oxytocin, but I found a way to be terrified. Donna was reassuring me that she was okay and just needed some help, but seeing my new, tiny baby being put on oxygen was petrifying. The room adopted a tense hush as she worked, helping Anna breathe and palpitating her chest. I don't think anybody really breathed until almost an hour, when I was handed back a pink, squirming baby. Nine people breathed simultaneous sighs of relief, and the bonding began all over again. Andrew cut her cord, and she was officially no longer connected to me.

    One year later, she is a bright, beautiful, smart little girl with the friendliest personality. She can tel you what a cow and a chicken say, and show you her nose. She waves at everyone she meets, and talks up a storm. She is so loved, by so many people, and I don't think she will ever really know how much she is loved. I know that God has an amazing plan for her, and I am so excited to be able to sit back and watch her grow into the amazing woman I know she will be. I have been, and always will be, so incredibly blessed to be her mother. <3

The first moment I held my baby.

 

When we realized she was a little too purple.

Our first family picture <3

 

When Anna met her Daddy <3

 

The cutting of the cord!



John 16:21: When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world.

1 Samuel 1:27: I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him.

Birth Story: Day 3!

Day 3: Tuesday, April 24, 2012

    After (another) long night of no sleep and lots of contractions, morning brought us Tuesday. Donna thought that I should have been almost fully dilated after more than a full day of steady contractions. Another cervical check told us that, alas, I was STILL at 4 centimeters (I was going to come to despise hearing the words “4 centimeters” over the course of that day). Bre went to buy us some breakfast (have I mentioned yet that I loved how much my midwife fed me?) and we all sat in a circle and ate. We had been cooped up in the house for two days, so Donna decided that Andrew and I would benefit from some fresh air and a long walk. One long hot  shower later, the two of us set out together.
    There was a school tour going on that day, and I didn’t want to be laboring in front of 200 happy kindergardeners, but trying to be quiet and inconspicuous was really difficult! We tried to stick to the areas where there were no kids, but they seemed to be following us, and I’m sure someone noticed me and how loud I was being. We stopped by the ice cream shop, and sat by the pond together, and relaxed in the warm morning air. It was nice to get out of the house and away from the crowd for a while (there were 10 people coming and going all the time!), so we stayed outside for as long as we could before I couldn’t bear to walk anymore.
    We went back inside for lunch (chicken salad courtesy of my wonderful mother-in-law) and ANOTHER cervical check. Donna told me I had progressed to 5 centimeters, but I remembered stories from other mamas about her fibbing just so I wouldn’t get discouraged. I harassed and harangled her and and Andrew for the next hour, until Andrew finally admitted that I was still at 4. That was all I could take; I broke down and sobbed. I was so exhausted, and overwhelmed, and I was truly, honestly scared. I didn’t know if something was wrong with me that was causing me to stall, and honestly I wasn’t even sure if I did want to keep going, because I had no idea what was going to happen when the baby finally did come, and I had no idea how to be a mom. Thank God for Donna. She knew that everything I was feeling was normal new mom anxiety, and she knew how to calm my fears. After lots of hugs, reassurances, and distractions, I was back in a laughing mood and ready to get the show on the road. Donna broke out the big guns and pulled out her bag of ‘witch medicine,’ as I called it. She gave me some homeopathic herbs that were supposed to help speed up my labor, and she made me drink a tonic called black and blue cohosh. She also made me do lunges and elephant walks all around the living room, which felt really dumb and I’m sure looked really silly! I was skeptical, but by the time supper rolled around, I felt like we were making more progress than we had been. As we all sat around and ate tortellini prepared by my mom, I bounced on my yoga ball and breathed through contractions.
    After supper, Donna checked me again and finally, FINALLY, she told me that I was 6 centimeters. I know that doesn’t sound like a major achievement, but after being at 4 for 24 hours, I was ecstatic. Donna said it was time to get the ball rolling, and broke my water around 8 pm. We were all sure that this was it, and the time to push would be upon us at any moment. We filled the birth pool again and I got right in and started swimming around while I moved into the transition stage of labor.
    Transition was rough. Everyone had told me that it was the worst part of labor, but I wasn’t prepared for how quickly the pain went from tolerable to agonizing. I kept wanting to lay down on the bed, because I was so, so tired, but laying down made everything ten times worse. Donna kept me up and moving: hanging off a rebozo on the bedroom door, kneeling, crawling, walking, and even sitting on her lap. I yelled and screamed my way into Wednesday morning, which we all knew would be bringing us a little angel before dawn.


I don't have any pictures of Tuesday since Sarah left, but fear not, there will be more tomorrow :)

Birth Story: Day 2!

Day 2: Monday, April 23, 2013

    Out of all four days of labor, Monday was probably the least (and at the same time, most) eventful. After a long, long night, nothing had changed; I was still just as tired, frustrated, and impatient, and my contractions were just as horrendous. I had no idea that things were only going to get worse. Andrew and I spent the day at home together, with him supporting me as the hours dragged on and on. I thought that that was the longest day of my life, but I had no idea that the worst was still to come. Our family popped in and out throughout the day; Andrew's parents and brother were with us, making meals, cleaning up, and mostly serving to distract me from the contractions. We were all expecting to have baby by the next morning, so there was a sense of anticipation hanging in the air all day. Every contraction brought with it concerned glances, excited voices in the next room, and excitement from everyone present.
 
    After spending the morning at home, we thought for sure that I was making progress, so we called Donna and asked her to come and check in on us. It was around 1 in the afternoon or so, and Donna came out to the house to keep us company and see how I was doing. After a quick cervical check, she told me that I was 2 centimeters dilated and 80% effaced, which everybody thought was amazing news. She thought that she would be able to go home and get ready for a long night, so she left, but we all knew for sure that Anna would be with us by Tuesday morning.

       The evening dragged on, and the contractions started to get longer and more painful, so Andrew decided it was 'time.' I remember I was protesting, telling him not to bother the midwife and I was fine, but in retrospect I am so glad he called her when he did, because we really needed her support. It was around 9 when we called her, as well as my mom, and Sarah, our photographer. When Donna arrived, I was so nervous. I was afraid, and exhausted, and I was in pain. I can't imagine having had to go through that night without her there with me. She came and the two of us sat in the dark, breathing and talking, trying to relax. She coached me, and counseled me through some of the emotions I was battling. A lot of other things had been happening, and she helped to settle my heart and soothe my mind. Another cervical check (wow, are those unpleasant!) told us that I was now 4 centimeters and 100% effaced.
 
    Donna and her assistant, Bre, set up the birth pool in our bedroom and unpacked all of their equipment. I can't describe how amazing the hot water felt. I floated around in the pool for a few hours while people trickled in. :P Sarah arrived around 10, and my mom about thirty minutes later. Everyone was expecting Anna to be born sometime that night, so we all found a place and tried our best to sleep. I remember drifting in and out of sleep the whole night, crying and yelling every time a bad contraction hit. Donna was camped out on the floor and coached me through each and every one. I honestly couldn't have done it without her. She couldn't have gotten any more sleep than I did, and she was still ready every time I needed her there. My sweet husband was my anchor, too. The whole night we just lay there together, and every time he would fall asleep, I would wake him up by being loud or rolling around. If any of you know my husband, you know he is the kind if person that needs sleepy in order to maintain a cheery composure, but he never once complained, just held and supported me as each hour ticked away. We slept off and on, prayed a lot, and kept hoping that any minute the time would come for sweet Anna to be with us.

 

  My first night in the birth pool, with my greatest blessing coaching me through.

I couldn't have done it without him.

 

 Donna comforting me while I tried to rest.

 Make sure you come back tomorrow for part three! :)

My birth story, day 1!

I invite you to join me as I recount my labor and birth and celebrate the arrival of my beautiful Anna! <3

Day 1: Sunday, April 22, 2012

 This adventure, the greatest of my life, began on Sunday, April 22, 2012. I had been waiting with bated breath for something to happen. I was trying to prepare myself for going past my due date, which wasn't really a happy prospect, but I knew Anna would come right when she was meant to. There was a wedding that day; Andrew's cousin Jenna was getting married. I started having my first real contractions that afternoon, about an hour before we we had to leave. With a quick consult with my midwife, we decided that we would go to the wedding, if only to keep my mind on something other than the contractions. We sat in the back row, and even then I felt rather conspicuous, in the middle of a wedding trying not to make it obvious that I was in labor. Several people even came up to me after the ceremony and asked if it was "the day." We didn't stay long for the reception, since the contractions were steadily getting closer together and more intense. When we got home, we called Donna, my amazing midwife, and she gave us with strict instructions to get as much rest as possible. We went to bed with feelings of excitement and joy, but also with a lot of nervousness and anticipation about what was to come. There was a lot of prayer by both Andrew and I that night. Neither of us knew what lay ahead, but we were readying ourselves for the wildest ride we had ever taken. 
    It didn't take me long to figure out that getting rest while having steady contractions is not really possible. I was so exhausted, and I knew I would need lots of energy for the trial ahead of me, but unfortunately sleeping through steady contractions is not an easy feat. Every time I would fall asleep, I would immediately be woken up by my body telling me that my baby was on her way. I spent the whole night laboring in a hot shower (luckily for me, we have two water heaters, so when the upstairs shower ran out all I had to do was go downstairs!). By the time morning came, I was exhausted, frustrated, and ready to get the whole thing over with. Little did I know, it was only the beginning!

Please come back tomorrow for day 2! Till then!